I promised you last week that I would continue discussing renting, dear readers. We had already covered people moving to the city (Lisbon); this week I’d thoughy I’d write about those who move out of the city to live in a quieter place – but I have something far more important to discuss this week.
(The promised blog about renting and related topics will be slightly delayed, but it’s coming – promise!)
I want to talk about chatterboxes
This is a first-class Portuguese phenomenon. Example. I’m standing at the counter of a hardware store, but I have to wait until the senhora finishes her chat with the previous customer. It takes about 10 minutes, and all that time I’m standing patiently (patiência!), without any sign of dutch impatience or irritation. I’ve gotten used to it by now, and there are important matters and Important Matters.
And making small talk is actually an Important Matter.
Much more important than the part I need to have for the faucet. How did I come to that conclusion? That’s because last week I saw an advertisement for a course, an international course no less, titled: “Making Small Talk with Strangers. How to Do It?” Wow. I’m taken aback. It’s also selling well.
People from all over Europe come for this. There was a dutch person there, and a Finn – but that might not be so surprising since Finns are known for being introverted and reserved. Finnish joke: “If a Finn looks at your shoelaces instead of his own, he likes you.” Let’s say: the opposite of portuguese people.
In this course, a full day is spent on how you don’t have to be ashamed, how you overcome your shyness – how you handle it, having a chat with strangers. There wasn’t a single portuguese person there, because portuguese people really don’t need it. Or so I thought. Portuguese people are genuine chatterboxes. Or so I thought. But I live outside the city, where people are more open than in the city, and as you get older, you often become a bit more shameless.
Easier with Small Talk, like genuine chatterboxes
Another story that came to me last week is about the loneliness crisis. Especially among young people, who feel massively lonely and alone, and therefore depressed and down. I had a chat (!) with an acquaintance I bumped into at the supermarket, who teaches at the University of Coimbra. He had been in the UK for a week to give guest lectures at a university there, and was quite shocked.
Everywhere it was quiet, subdued. Everyone on their phone. If someone said something, they often got a frown of annoyance in return. No atmosphere in which you feel comfortable having a chat with a stranger. “Quite a difference from here,” he said, “although it has changed quite a bit here too, now that I think about it – everyone has a phone, much less interaction with each other.”
Venice.ai reports on this: “Young people in Portugal, like in many other parts of the world, are facing a significant loneliness and mental health crisis. According to a WHO report, between 17% and 21% of young people aged 13 to 29 feel lonely. This loneliness is not just a fleeting feeling, but has serious consequences for mental and physical health.
There is an alarming increase in reports of depression and anxiety among adolescents and young adults, reflecting the deterioration of mental health in this age group. The feeling of loneliness among young Portuguese people has significantly increased, with a rise in the number of young people feeling alone or excluded.”
More ways to connect with others than ever before, but it seems to have the opposite effect. Maybe a loose thought, but in a country where social cohesion is traditionally excellent, feeling lonely might be even worse. Especially if you’re a young rural person moving to the city because you have more job opportunities there.
That makes small talk even more Important!
Society is changing rapidly, and as a young person, you haven’t yet found your place; this has always been the case, but now it seems to cause feelings of inadequacy and exclusion. Who is doing something about it? Politicians? Health institutions? Who?
Venice.ai: “Yes, there are various initiatives in Portugal aimed at addressing the loneliness crisis and the mental health problems faced by young people. The program “Tens Futuro em Portugal” is a notable example, which includes 18 measures to support young people in areas such as education, housing, healthcare, and taxes. This program aims to improve the quality of life for young people and provide opportunities for those just starting adulthood.
Additionally, there are specific initiatives to support first-time homebuyers, such as the government guarantee that facilitates access to mortgages for young people up to 35 years old. The government has also introduced tax exemptions and other supportive measures to reduce the costs associated with owning a home, which can help alleviate some of the financial pressure that contributes to loneliness and anxiety.
Other initiatives include youth employability programs, such as “Bora Jovens,” which aims to inspire and empower young people aged 18 to 25 who are at risk of social and educational exclusion. This program provides support and guidance to help young people find a path to employability, which can contribute to increasing their self-confidence and social integration.
In the area of mental health, there is growing attention to government policies that address the hidden mental health crisis among young people. Although there is no direct reference to a specific program, the need for psychological interventions and national policies is recognized to reduce the negative impacts on the health and well-being of young portuguese people.
These initiatives are part of a broader effort to create a more supportive and inclusive environment for young people in Portugal, combat loneliness, and promote their overall well-being.”
I find this encouraging to read. It will probably turn out well. Young people will also learn to make small talk with each other. Once I was like that too, and as you can see: I’m even having chats with A-I* now. And I didn’t know A-I a few months ago either.
But now you do understand, don’t you, dear readers, that I jwas dying to have some small talk about chatterboxes, right?
* A-I: Artificial Intelligence. Venice.ai is one of those I ask things, because they don’t secretly spy and pass things on to higher authorities. A-I is very polite and friendly; you can check everything they say; and I think we should learn to be familiar with this stranger.
We moved here in 2000 from Rotterdam, the Netherlands, to the Termas-da-Azenha, Portugal.
We started to rebuild one of portugals cultural heirlooms: Termas-da-Azenha, an old spa.
You’ll find mosaics and paintings everywhere.
Since Covid we rent the houses for a longer period of time, not as holiday houses anymore.
Each week a little blog about what is happening around us. An easy read. A few minutes in another world. A little about what it going on in Portugal. If you plan your holiday to Portugal, it might be a nice preparation.
In the weekend we publish it on Bluesky, Facebook, Pinterest and Instagram.